Folds of Honor – Tiffany Eckert’s Story

Greg:rnHello, and welcome to the Imagine That podcast. I’m your host, Greg Weimer, founder, partner, and wealthrnmanager at Confluence Financial Partners. Each month, we’ll explore new ways to help you maximize yourrnlife and your legacy and meet some extraordinary people along the way. So if you’re looking to get more outrnof your life today and legacy tomorrow, let’s get started.rnWelcome to the second part of our two-part episode on Folds of Honor. If you listened to the first part, yournknow all about Folds of Honor and the important work they do. We met Crystal Popella and she shared herrnexperience and why she founded the Western Pennsylvania chapter of the organization.rnToday, Tiffany will help us understand exactly why an organization like Folds of Honor means so much.rnBecause Tiffany is a Gold Star wife. Her husband, Andy, gave the ultimate sacrifice so all of us couldrncontinue to live in freedom. Andy was killed in action in Iraq. Tiffany was generous enough to share herrnremarkable story with us and it is my honor to introduce her to our listeners.rnTiffany:rnI’m one of thousands and of a group that I wish never was, but it’s my honor and privilege to be Andy’s wife.rnAnd to be the one that was left behind to carry on his light. And I can say a hundred percent, my life has, therntrajectory of my entire life has been changed because of the vision that Dan Rooney had that day.rnGreg:rnTiffany, if you could give your story just to help everybody understand, and this is one of 35,000. But if yourncould just give your story and talk about, you know, how freedom really isn’t free and the price that yourrnfamily has paid.rnTiffany:rnI met Andy Eckert on September 19th of 2002. And I’ll never forget the first time I looked him in the eye. Thernpiercing blue eyes, the same blue eyes that our children Marley and Myles have, which is the greatest gift.rnBut also some days just stings, you know? He knew from the minute we met that I was his forever. We metrnup the next day and we spent the whole evening together. And when it came time to part, we were sitting onrnhis front step and he said, Tiffany, I need to tell you something. And you might never wanna talk to me again.rnBut if you could just hear me out, I have something I wanna share with you. And the long and short of it, he,rnagain, so intentionally looked me right in the eye, and he said, I know that when I met you last night, I met myrnwife. I called my mom at four in the morning and I told her, I met Tiffany, I’m gonna marry her.rnI’ve told all of my friends that I met my wife. And he said, and I know after January 1st of this upcoming year,rnI’m gonna have to go away with the military. And I don’t know when, how, where or why, but I know I’mrngonna leave. And when I leave, you’ll be my wife. And it was really strange at that point in my life, I was sornyoung and I thought I had everything planned out. And this was 100 percent a contradiction to everything Irnthought that was mapped for me and everything I wanted. But at the same time, it felt so natural. And itrnwasn’t just because it was there. It was, it was Andy. It was as if, you know, that moment that we met thernnight previous, it was like our souls had already met. We already knew each other. There was just thisrnperfect harmony, this, this ameshed feeling that I’ve never felt with anybody besides my children. It wasrnmeant to be. And so I looked at him and I said, OK, I believe you. And he was right. Was a handful of monthsrndown the road, February 24, 2003, he got activated to go and be part of the initial wave in the firstrnoccupation of OIF which is Operation Iraqi Freedom.rnI wasn’t with him when he got the call. But I got to our apartment and I walked through the door and he’d justrnsobbing. His face was soaked in tears, his blue, blue eyes, the, the backdrop behind him was just thesernblood-stained eyes. And he looked up at me and he ran over and he dropped to his knees and he put armsrnaround me and he said, I’m so sorry, our baby is not gonna know who I am. Because we had just found out Irnwas pregnant. And at the time we didn’t know if we were having a boy or a girl. And I grabbed him on eitherrnside of his face. And I looked at him just like, he always looked at me with such intention and conviction. AndrnI said, no, I promise, no matter what happens, this baby’s gonna know exactly who you are. I promise.rnAnd then just as nontraditional, as every other part of our relationship, he stood on both feet and looked mernright in the eye, standing, and said, don’t answer me now. I have to go away for a couple of days to do somernpaperwork. But when I come back, I want you to marry me. But don’t, don’t answer me right now. And hernwent away for a couple days. And when he came back, we went down to the Lucas County courthouse inrnToledo, Ohio. And we got married in a hallway by a stranger and I was wearing jeans. And you look at thernpictures, which we only have one. And Andy was so happy that if he had smiled any wider, his face would’verncracked. And I looked terrified, which I was. OK? I was 21. I was pregnant. I was confident that my husbandrnprobably was gonna miss the birth of our first child and my entire pregnancy, which I was right.rnAnd I, I knew that I loved this person more than I’d ever loved anything in my entire life. And then he wasrngoing to war and also in the pictures, you’ll notice Andy had gone out that morning and he took horticulturernin high school. And so flowers and any type of greenery was very important to him. He went out and he got arnpale pink gerber daisy with some hot pink gerber daisies and had them put in a little bouquet. And I was like,rnthat’s so silly. Why would I take that to the courthouse? He said, you have to, there’s one flower for each ofrnus: me, you and the baby. And three means, I love you. And I can’t do much for you and this isn’t thernwedding you deserve, but I want you to hold these. And I did. And gerber daisies have become such a pivotalrnpoint in the whole timeline of our story in that, two years, two months and 11 days later, when all of us wererngathered, as Andy was being lowered into the ground, graveside, every single person that was there,rnhundreds and hundreds of hot pink and pale pink gerber daisies were placed on top of his casket.rnAnd in all of these years, since we’ve lost Andy, for every special occasion, for every school dance that he’srnmissed, for every major event, my children Marley and Myles both receive pale pink or hot pink gerberrndaisies. And every now and again, anonymously hot pink gerber daisies will show up at the grave or on myrnfront porch. I don’t know who puts them there, but I know that ultimately, it’s Andy doing it. So after we gotrnmarried on February 28th, it was less than a week later he left for his first tour. On March 6th. And he wasrnon a 17-month deployment. And just like we both feared, he did not get to come and see Marley born in July.rnShe was born on July 17th, 2003. It was one of the most wonderful and heartbreaking days of my life. Irnnever said anything to anyone, but the whole time, all I wanted was to hear Andy’s voice.rnAnd I was in labor for way longer than I should have been. It wasn’t until almost two days later after he gotrnhis Red Cross message that I had gone into labor, that Andy was able to call me on a satellite phone from therndesert to tell me that he loved me. And that’s all I needed. The call was less than two minutes becausernthings were so tough then. The satellite phone dropped the call, but he was able to tell me, I’m sorry, I’m notrnthere. I love, you know that I’m with you, I’m in your heart. I’m so proud of you. You can do this. And thenrnshortly after that, it was like, I felt this release and I was able to give birth to Marley. And I’ll never forget thernfirst time I met her, she was placed and I was so tired, but I looked down at her and I said, oh, there you are.rnI’m happy to meet you, Marley Freedom. I love you. And so does daddy. And then this beautiful moment wasrnoccurring. And my dad goes, Freedom? Marley Freedom? What? That’s not her name. I said, yeah, it is. Andrnthen I explained to my dad, Andy’s not here. And when Marley looks back at the pictures from when she wasrnborn, I want her and her dad, most importantly, but I want everybody to know the reason he is not in thernpictures wasn’t because he didn’t want to be, but because he’s fighting for her freedom, my freedom, yourrnfreedom. Her name is Marley Freedom. And I think she has the coolest name in the world. And her dadrnthought so too. So it all worked out and it ended up being almost prophetic, truly that she had that name thatrnshe has. Andy got to come home when she was 11 months old to meet her in April of 2004.rnAnd when he came home, he was a purple heart veteran who had been deemed non-deployable. He neverrnhad to go back to conflict again, ever. He still had shrapnel in his face, he still had shrapnel in his shoulder.rnAnd he narrowly missed never coming home to us. He had been impacted by an IED explosion on Marchrn15th, 2004. And the piece that was meant to take his life missed by a centimeter, missed his jugular. And ernwas saved in that moment. He was able to home to us. It was just a handful of months later down the road. Irnwas at his Army Reserve unit because I was the family readiness leader for his company. And he came to thernroom that I was in and I knew something was up. And he sat down and he put his hand on my knee and hernsaid, babe, they said, if I signed a waiver, I can go back. You know, my unit just got activated and these arernall the guys that I went to Basic and AIT with. And I don’t wanna leave you again. But I need to go. And yourndon’t have to say yes, and I’m not begging you to say yes. But this is very important to me. And I believe thisrnis what I’m supposed to do. And at that time we had just found out I was pregnant with Myles, so here wernwere again about repeat history. Here I was so young, 22 years old. And I l looked at him and I said, this isrnnot what I want, but I could never tell you no. If this is what you feel like you’re supposed to do, then yes, yourncan sign the waiver. I will support you. But when you come home, I can’t do this again. And he said, Irnpromise, I’m gonna make it home. And we’ll be America’s dream team. We’ll just get through this one morerntime. So I went with him, and I watched him as he signed the waiver. And coincidentally, every other soldierrnthat had been deployed in OIF1 that didn’t have to go again, not because they were injured but because ofrnthe timeline. His brothers went and they signed waivers too.rnAnd they went back together. They left for that deployment in OIF3 on Christmas Day, 2004. The onlyrnChristmas we ever spent together was in a hotel room in Indiana. I still have the little, tiny tree in the tiny bluernornaments, blue and silver bulbs that I bought at Walmart for Marley’s first and only Christmas ever with herrndad. And the only Christmas that we spent together as a family. And, you know, that’s what families like oursrndo is they make the most of what moments they’re given. And they’re the grandest moments. We were in arnhotel room. We weren’t in a huge house with a huge tree and tons and tons of gifts, but we had each otherrnand that’s all that mattered. And those are the things that I try to tell people about and share with them. Thernmoments that matter most in life are the ones that you don’t even realize they’re your first or your last untilrnit’s over.rnWe sent Andy away on Christmas day and he called me, Myles was born in March and he called me about arnweek before I was due. And he said, Hey, I’m in Kuwait. I think I’m gonna get to come home, but I don’trnknow yet, but I think I’m gonna get to come home and see Myles born. And he said, I’ll call you as soon as Irncan. And day after day after day passed, there was no call. And I was ready to have that boy. I had a crackedrnpelvis and I called my doctor on Thursday of that week. And I said, listen, I can’t be pregnant one more day. Irnam miserable. I don’t think I can walk anymore. I don’t know where my husband is. I did this once withoutrnhim. I can do it again. I think he’s on his way home.rnI don’t know, but I can’t physically do this anymore. And he said, OK, we’ll induce you tomorrow. Tomorrowrncame. It was Friday the 25th of March 2005. I got a call that morning and it was Andy. He said, Hey. I saidrnwhere the heck have you been, I haven’t from you for a week? What’re you doing? He’s like, I don’t think I’mrngonna get to come home, I’m really sorry. I said, well, I’m having this baby tonight. And he goes, just kidding.rnI’m in Chicago. Can you at 10 AM from the Toledo airport? So he made it just in the nick of time and as faternwould have it. I didn’t need to be induced. I went into labor on my own that night. And Andy got to be homernfor 14 days. It was the greatest 14 days that I’ve ever had ever. The only time that my family was togetherrncomplete as a family of four. And oftentimes I’ll recount the fact that I have one picture of all four of usrntogether.rnAnd that is in the moment at the hospital when Marley was brought up to meet Myles. And that’s important.rnAnd I, I share that often because oftentimes especially moms, we like to hide behind the camera. We like torndeny the opportunity to be in pictures because we think we don’t look good enough. Our hair is a mess, ourrnbody isn’t right. And we forgo the opportunity to be in these lasting memories. And so to anyone listening, Irnwould say, any chance you have to in a picture with your loved ones, your children, your spouse, anybodyrnimportant to you — you need to seize that moment and that opportunity. Because I literally have one picturernof my family together, only one. And none of us are looking at the camera. It’s a beautiful moment, we’re allrnlooking at each other. And I’m thankful for that. But I wish I had more because at the end of the day, whenrnsomeone’s gone, they’re gone. Death is permanent. And one day all you’re going have is photos andrnmemories and what you’ve stored in your mind.rnSo like I said, Andy was home for 14 days, greatest 14 days ever. Every morning I woke up and Andy andrnMarley were sitting at the kitchen table, eating either Froot Loops or Lucky Charms talking to each other. Andrnshe had crooked pigtails on her head. And the neatest part I found out about this after Andy had been killedrnwas that the weeks leading up to coming home to see Myles born, he had deployed his fellow female soldiersrnto teach him how to braid just in case Marley’s hair was long enough to do so, which it wasn’t, but he figuredrnout how to get her piggies in and they were crooked and they were perfect. And that is one of my favoriternmemories of my husband. He was so intentional and thoughtful and he planned everything out and he tried torndo the best he could.rnAnd he was present, although he was an 11-hour time difference. And so many thousands of miles away,rnAndy was a part of our every day because I promised him in that moment on February 24th, 2003, when hernwas deployed the first time that our kids would know who he was. And he promised from the moment I metrnhim, that he would be there a hundred percent. And he was. Last time I ever saw Andy alive was thernbeginning of April 2005 at the Toledo Lucas County Airport. Andy looked at me when we were standing therernwaiting to give the TSA agent his ID. Tears streaming down his face similar to the day he’d been deployed.rnAnd there’s a lot of things I don’t tell anyone. And I’ll only ever share with my kids, but oftentimes I dornrecount certain moments from this time. And that is that he looked at me and he said, this is the last time I’mrnever gonna see you. I know I’m not coming home.rnI know I’ll never be here again. And I’m very sorry, but I know that you can do this. And know that I’ll be withrnyou every day and that I love you and I’m proud of you. And I support every decision you make. It’ll be thernright one. Then he looked the lady who was standing at the podium and he said, this is my wife, Tiffany.rnShe’s the smartest, most beautiful woman in the world and the mother of my children. And this is Marley andrnthis is Myles. These are my kids. And I love them so much. And you could see she kinda teared up a littlernand handed him his ID back and said yes sir. And then he walked in the line and kept every five feet or so, hernwould stop and turn around, and wave to us. He’d walk and he’d stop and he’d turn around and wave to usrnuntil we couldn’t see him anymore. And that’s the last time I ever saw Andy alive.rnIt was on Mother’s Day 2005, May 8th. I woke up and it wasn’t the same wakeup that I’d had every day sincernMyles was born and Andy was back in country. Every day without fail between three and four in the morning,rnAndy would call me and be like, babe, what are you doing? And I’d be like, well I was sleeping. That call didrnnot come that day. Never came. I went about my day for the first few hours and all of my friends called. Thernother girls that had their soldiers deployed with Andy. And I remember telling my friend, Aubrey, I said,rnsomething’s wrong. I know something’s wrong with Andy, something’s happened. And she said, no, no, no.rnThey’re probably on lockdown. As soon as they can get to the phones, you know Andy will be the first in line,rnhe’s gonna call, it’s Mother’s Day. He’ll be the first in line. And I said, no, Aubrey, I know something’s wrong.rnAnd it was about an hour and a half later, I got to Andy’s foster parents’ house, they had raised him until thernend of high school so that he could graduate. And I just said to his foster mom, something’s wrong. I thinkrnsomething’s happened to Andy. And then my phone started ringing and the phone calls were toggling backrnand forth between Southfield, Michigan, where there was a soldier who was attached to Andy’s unit andrnDover, which if you’re getting calls from Dover, that’s not a good sign. That’s where casualty operationsrncome through. And the one guy said, I just need to know where you are Miss Eckert. I just need to knowrnwhere you are. They didn’t have the correct address for us.rnAnd then when I got on the line with Dover the second time I said to the woman, ma’am, is my husbandrndead? And she paused for what felt like a really long time, but it probably wasn’t and she said, I, I need tornknow where you are, Mrs. Eckert. And then it was about an hour later, a military vehicle pulled up in therndriveway and I was sitting on a rock at the end of the sidewalk. And when only one got out, I thought, okay,rnhe’s just injured. So we’re gonna go to Germany and bring him home and we’re gonna figure it out. It’srngonna be fine. And you know, I don’t remember that gentleman’s name. I couldn’t pick him out of a crowd,rnbut if I ever saw his eyes again, I would know, I would know exactly who he was, cuz that’s what I wasrnstaring at the whole time he was speaking. And I remember every word he said. And when I walked awayrnfrom him and oftentimes people in our situation, they imagine what would happen if I was notified.rnAnd I’m sure just regular people may be watching movies where there’s a notification and they think, oh,rnwhat would I do if I found out someone had been killed? Well I walked up the sidewalk and at that time I’drnhad time to call my friends in the area, my military friends and they were sitting on the porch and everyonernsaid what happened? And all I could say was Andy passed away today. And I walked up the steps and Irnwalked away from everyone. And I sat on a bench all by myself on the opposite side of the porch. I rememberrnputting my heads in my, my head in my hands. And I said, I can’t do this. I can’t, I can’t do this. And I startedrnto cry and my friend came over, her mom and she smacked leg really hard, which was good because shernwoke me up out of whatever I was at the moment, and she said, oh Tiffany, yes you will and yes you can.rnAnd she grabbed me by my chin and she turned my face very aggressively towards the other end of thernporch. And all I could see were Marley and Myles. And she said, yes, you can. And yes, you will becausernthose babies need you. You have to get up every day and you have to do this.rnYou have to do this, Tiffany. And I stood up. And I have never stopped standing. There was never a single dayrnthat I didn’t get outta bed because Marley and Myles needed me. There was never a single day that I feltrnsorry for myself to the point where I couldn’t function because Marley and Myles needed me. And I havernstood every second of every single day that has passed in the last 17 years since losing Andy. And I wouldrnlisten that if you have the opportunity to be a Miss Terry for someone, do it. Just like Dan had the opportunityrnto see out that window and see what he saw that has changed everything and started Folds of Honor. Yournhave opportunities to be Miss Terry for someone, you just have to be awake. You just have to be aware. Yournhave to be there for people. Life isn’t about you. You have one chance, one opportunity. Stop being selfishrnand be there in moments where you could be the only person. Ms. Terry changed the trajectory of my life.rn100%. I wouldn’t have made it this far. If she hadn’t been there with me in that moment. And I could recountrnso many memories and so many things that to some, you would say, you would classify them asrnheartbreaking. But for me, I would say, don’t let your heart be broken over the trauma I’ve experienced.rnHowever, when you hear stories like mine, let your heart bend, let your heart bend so that you can make arnpositive change and gain new perspective for your life and the opportunity that you’ve been given to live. Yournknow, I was 23 when Andy died, he was 24. Marley was 20 months old and Myles was one month old. ThisrnMother’s Day, May 8th will be 17 years since Andy died. And it just so happens, I believe it’s the third timernthat May 8th has fallen on Mother’s Day again, since he died.rnAnd I would say in all these years, I’m 40 now. I’m starting to get forehead lines. I’m starting to get crow’srnfeet. I’m starting to get gray hair. I’m a little overweight. But you know what? I am so thankful for thatrnopportunity. And the perspective that life is short and my husband will always, always be 24. He did not getrnto age. We were supposed to grow old together. I wanted to watch get laugh lines and I wanted to watch hisrnhair shift from black to silver. But that didn’t happen. And so I would say to people listening, embrace whornyou are in this moment because you get to be in this moment because of fate. And also because of peoplernlike Andy, who are willing to die for you, does that make sense?rnGreg:rnYou are amazing. We just need to breathe. I think, candidly, I wanna say thank you. It feels shallow. It’s notrnenough. You just need to know we’re grateful. I don’t think that’s enough. I just would say that what we allrncan do is just never forget that freedom isn’t free. Never forget Tiffany’s story. Never forget Andy’s story.rnLet’s realize the sacrifice that a very small percentage of people make so we can live our lives. There was sornmuch in there. I wrote like moments. I think you said moments don’t ha— like you don’t realize they’rernspecial moments until you look back on ’em. You’re not always aware pictures, pictures. I was at a surprisernparty on Saturday and they’re all the pictures I’m like, wow.rnThe pictures of this gentleman, who’s a really good friend of mine and his family, I thought were awesome.rnMs. Terry, there should be a, there should be a national Ms. Terry award, right? I mean that Ms. Terry, Irnmean, just be Ms. Terry. That also like listening to you when she turns your chin to your children, it showsrnyou whether you’re talking about Andy, Tiffany or Crystal, how powerful life can be when you actually focusrnon other people. One of my questions was it was gonna be like, how do you stay strong every day? How dornyou stand up every day? How do you stay so positive and committed to Andy’s legacy? But you answered it.rnTiffany:rnWell there’s more too. I would say, well, for me personally another very, very valid point is I never got to sayrngoodbye to my husband and every single thing I do every single day, especially this work, this is how I say, Irnlove you to Andy. This is my tangible way. This work and the way I live my life and the way I treat people now,rnI’m not perfect. Some, some days I have bad days or I get frustrated, but for the most part, I am genuinelyrnvery giving, very forgiving, very intentional, very present. And it all goes back to the fact that I will never havernclosure. I’m not getting to say goodbye. And I will never hear back at this point in my life, or for the last 17rnyears. I love you too, Tiff. I have to seek it out if that makes sense.rnSo especially in regards to any work I do with the military and awareness around the Gold Star communityrnand Folds of Honor. And anytime I tell our story, this is how I tell Andy, I love you. And this is how I showrnMarley and Myles that Andy and I loved each other. And we loved them. Because, you know, I’ve said forrnyears, I lost a lot and this was very traumatic. You know, I was when your frontal lobe isn’t even fully formedrntill you’re 25 years old. So a lot of things happened before I was medically fully sound, if that makes sense.rnThis is truly how I make sense of something that doesn’t make sense. It doesn’t make sense. Andy wasrnwonderful. He would’ve been the best dad ever. He would’ve been the best coach ever. He would’ve been allrnthe things. You know, Marley has never heard her dad say, you’re beautiful. I love you. Now I tell her thatrnevery day, more than she’d like to hear. Enough for three people let alone just him and I. Myles has neverrnthrown a ball with him. You know, I, I try to be, fill the void, but I can’t. I promised Andy, our kids would knowrnhim. It always goes back to that promise. And I promised Andy that I would love him forever, which I will.rnGreg:rnSo Tiffany, incredible. Could you make the connection between your incredible story and what educationrnmeant to Andy to you and how Folds of Honor have helped you fulfill that mission?rnTiffany:rnYes. So the night before Andy was killed, within hours of his death, he called home. And again, he said manyrnthings. I don’t share everything. He did reiterate again that he knew he wasn’t coming home. And the lastrnconversation we ever had was in regard to, Andy thought I was the smartest most wonderful person he everrnknew. And he knew that I needed to go to school. And he, he said, I know it might take a while because thernkids are young, but no matter what you need to get an education, it’s very important. And our kids need tornhave an education, that’s very important to me. I need you to promise that that’s gonna happen. And Irnagreed, and it’s taken a long time for me personally, to go back to school, but in the fall of 2020, in the cruxrnof the pandemic, I decided to quit my job and go back to school. And in doing so, not only am I fulfilling thatrnfinal and last promise, which I was putting it off because it’s the last promise I ever made to him.rnAnd there’s a big sense of finality in that. The last thing you’re hanging onto, you know, that’s over. But I’m,rnI’m glad I’m in school. I’m, I’m full-time in college and I’m doing very well, but number one, I’m, I’m fillingrnthat promise. But also, I found healing. My major is human development and family studies with a minor inrngerontology. So my major is the study of human development across the lifespan, which has provided mernwith an intense amount of healing in regard to my childhood, as well as the trauma of losing my husband atrnsuch a young age. And it has helped me to be a better person. When I say I have found healing, 100% I haverntruly found healing and that wouldn’t have happened if I didn’t go back to school. And Folds of Honor hasrnprovided that opportunity for me. Additionally, my children have been recipients for several years.rnMarley is now 18 years old. She graduates in just a couple of weeks and she has been able to go to a privaternhigh school for the last four years where she has excelled. Her cumulative GPA has been above a 4.0 for thernlast four years. She applied to multiple colleges and was accepted into every single one. Some big collegesrntoo. She’s in the National Honor Society. She’s the captain of her rowing team. You know, she’s done a lot ofrnamazing things, which she wouldn’t have done if she wasn’t at the school she was at. She just told me thisrnweekend, she declared yesterday, which was the college decision day. She’s decided to stay close to home. Irnhad a different idea of where I wanted her to go, but ultimately is her decision and she and I will be at thernsame college in the fall.rnAnd now I’m hoping we take Spanish together because I’m gonna need a study buddy. So that’s reallyrnspecial. And then my son, Myles, he is 17. He is a junior in high school and you know, school comes easy forrnsome and for others, it doesn’t. And oftentimes people forget that everyone has different skill. Now, when Irnlook at my son, I have always seen this amazing young man who has so much to offer the world, but school’srnbeen a struggle for him. Since kindergarten. And I remember when he was very young sitting in a meetingrnand I was told, you know, he’s got a lot of challenges you should probably come up with a less traditionalrnplan for him. College might not be in his future. And I said, oh, I beg to differ. I’m pretty sure if he wants to gornto college, he’s gonna go to college.rnAnd here we are, for the last several years, Myles has utilized his Folds of Honor scholarship for privaterntutoring, which has put him in a place that I was told. He’d never be and ending his junior year, for him,rnMyles has an excellent GPA and it’s looking like he won’t have to go full day for senior year next year. And hernwill also be going to the same college that Marley and myself are at. So that will be a fun time.rnGreg:rnWow. u0026lt;Laughu0026gt;rnTiffany:rnAnd it of first and foremost, it’s because I love my kids that they have succeeded so well, but also becausernFolds of Honor has come in, locked arms and shown us the support and love and additional resources thatrnwe need in order to be successful in regard to our education. And I would say, and I say this every time Irnspeak, you’re not giving a donation to Folds of Honor.rnThat’s not how I view it. I view it as an investment. And oftentimes people wanna see the return on theirrninvestments. And to that, I would say, you may not see it because our group, unfortunately, is bigger than itrnshould be. However, every night when you crawl into bed or every day as you walk around in life and you’rerncovered by that blanket of freedom, that is where you find your return. That is where you find the return onrnyour investment. And it’s immeasurable. You cannot go wrong by providing anybody an education, especiallyrnchildren like Marley and Myles or spouses like myself. You cannot go wrong by giving someone the gift ofrnlearning and a debt free education.rnGreg:rnTiffany, we’re in the investment business, but you’re one of the best investments I think anybody could everrnwanna make. u0026lt;Laughu0026gt;rnGreg:rnTiffany or Crystal who would like to step up and tell this story that I think is one of the best stories I’ve everrnheard about being awake about major Dan Rooney. Who’s got it?rnTiffany:rnThe long, long and short of it is Dan was on a flight and the pilot came over the speaker and asked that theyrnremained seated because they had hero traveling on board. And he was looking out the side window. He, herndescribes it as I believe, a starry night, looking out the window. And he watched as Brock Buckland’s bodyrnwas rolled out from underneath the cargo area of the plane. And he watched this entire scene unfold wherernBrock’s small son was standing there and they received his remains. And when he turned back around, afterrnwatching everything play out, most of the people on the plane had gotten up and gotten off the plane andrndisregarded the message that had come over. And in that moment, he had this pivotal, I would describe itrnfrom hearing the story so many times firsthand and via the video.rnHe had this awakening. This call to action, where he knew he had to do something as an American, as arnveteran, just as a general human being. He had to do something to change what had happened. And I willrnsay, hundred percent, in all of the years that have passed since he experienced that epiphany, he has maderna huge sweeper wave of change for my, the community that myself and my children are a part of. And Irnbelieve the ripple effect is immeasurable. What he’s been able to accomplish because he was awake and hernwas cognizant. And he was aware in that moment where other people were selfish and didn’t care and werernin a rush. And couldn’t take five minutes to show reverence to one of our fallen.rnGreg:rnThe reality is I ask everybody to listen to it again and take notes. And I think there’s so many lessons in therernon great investments we can make, and gratitude we can have, and pictures we can take. I remember on myrnwedding night, there was a manager of the brokerage firm I was at that day. And he said he gave me a $50rnbill, which was like back then a trillion. And he gave me a $50 bill. And he said, I’m gonna give you this $50rnbill, as long as you do one thing. And he said, make sure you kiss Lori before you go to bed every night andrntell her you love her. And, you know, he was that Mrs. Terry for me that day. And Tiffany, thank you forrnreminding me of that today. You, you really are a remarkable person.rnTiffany:rnThank you for receiving it, man. I’m just an ordinary person. Who’s been through some extraordinary thingsrnand I’m trying to make the most of my life, which is what we should all be doing. We just have to do betterrnand be better. So thank you for being open.rnGreg:rnI think you just did a pretty good job of explaining a hero but thank you for that explanation. I think it’s prettyrnwell done.rnTiffany:rnWell, too, I would say, I know you’re in the financial business. And so a lot of people listening are in realm,rnbut not everybody has the same skillsets or resources. So I would to anyone listening in the off chance thatrndoesn’t have the financial resources to support. Oftentimes people ask, well, what can I do? I’m just, what,rnwhat can I do if I don’t have money to give? And I would say, for me personally, I would never ask you forrnanything, regardless of who you are or what resources you have. However, at the end of the day, if you reallyrnwanna know what I personally, as a surviving spouse of a soldier who was killed in action, and the mother ofrntwo kids that were left behind, what I think is: you need to just be a better person, be awake like Dan was. Bernthere like Miss Terry was. Be present every day like I am. Be a better person. If you can’t give money, yournknow, there’s other ways. Make your life count for something.rnGreg:rnTiffany, would you feel comfortable telling Myles’ story?rnTiffany:rnSure. It was the beginning of February 2014. We had a lot of severe weather in our area and the kids hadrnhad multiple snow days in a row. And we had a day off from school that day, but the weather was nicernenough so that we could go out. And I asked the kids, where do you wanna go? Let’s go to lunch. And theyrnsaid, let’s go to Cracker Barrel. And so we were walking in the cracker barrel and unbeknownst to me untilrnwe were in the restaurant, Myles had found $20 in the, in the parking lot. And as we were walking in, he wasrnlike super excited and him and Marley were going back and forth and da-da-da-da-da. And we sat down andrnMyles was like, mom, I found $20 in the parking lot, our waitress is getting a really big tip today. I was like,rnokay buddy. He was like, don’t worry, I got the tip. I was like, alright buddy. So then, I don’t know, 15rnminutes or so later, Frank Dailey walked in with his wife and his grandson.rnAnd he was in uniform because he was airman at the 180th in our area, this Air Force base. And he, herncame in and he sat down and Myles’ eyes were just really big. And he was following him until he sat in hisrnseat. And then he looked at me and he looked back at Frank and he looked at me. And he said, mom, you’rerngonna have to take care of the waitress, cause I’m gonna buy that guy’s lunch instead. And I said, OK, that’srnfine. And so Myles at, I always have post-it notes and a pen on me because we, typically it would be Marleyrnand I, but we would leave random notes of kindness or pay it forwards and whatever, just scatter themrnthroughout our day, whenever we were, anywhere. Always based on being anonymous. And Myles wrote thisrnnote and it said, Dear soldier, my dad was a soldier, I found this $20 in the parking lot when we got here. Wernlike to pay it forward in our family.rnToday is your lucky day. And he signed it Myles Eckert, a Gold Star kid. And he wrapped the 20 up in thatrngreen post-it, and then it took him a while. Cuz Myles is very, very nervous. He’s very shy. And I walked overrnwith him eventually, cuz he kept trying to go and give it to Frank and he would run over there and run back.rnAnd so finally I walked over there with him and I said, Hey, my son wants to give you this. And he said, Hey,rnthanks. And that was that. And we went about the rest of our day. Well I think what had happened wasrnFrank’s daughter took a picture of the note and posted it online locally. And then all of a sudden, people, yournknow, the power of social media and Facebook people were like, oh I know that kid.rnAnd they were tagging me. They were like, Hey, that’s Tiffany, I know them, blah, blah, blah, blah. And itrnbecame just like locally, this organically wild story and local news picked it up. And then before, you know it,rnall these outlets were calling and Steve Hartman called and he asked if he could come out and do a story,rnwhich he did. And then it went super mega viral. And we were getting calls from every national outlet. Irnmean, I said no to Steve Harvey, Meredith Viera, Good Morning America, all these things. And then Ellenrncalled and it was partially like Ellen. And then also we were getting so much traction. People were sendingrnmail to the kids’ school. They were, our, our mail was just insane. People were finding my phone number andrncalling. People from all over the world. And I said, we gotta put the brakes on this because I don’t know whatrnto do. And so I said yes to Ellen because I felt that it was the most mainstream platform to get the word out tornsay hey, this is really great and nice.rnBut if you guys could stop sending stuff to my house or, you know, we were trying to redirect the pay itrnforwards to something else. And I’ll tell you, behind the scenes, I’m a single mom and life is, it’s hard to be arnsingle mom and financially I could have taken advantage of the situation, but I never felt I was supposed to.rnNever. And so we paid everything forward. We gave it all away and we directed it to a different charity at therntime that was before we knew what Folds was. And in one initiative in a couple of months we raised 1.8rnmillion. And in the time since, you know, 2014 we’ve raised, I mean, I don’t even know at this point, becausernit was never about keeping track, right. And we’ve continued to do things, you know, publicly. And thenrnobviously still tried to maintain, do anonymous things here and there as we can.rnAnd the beauty of Myles’ story is that it went, I believe so far and wide is because it was genuine. And I feelrnthat my job all this time has been to be the protector of Myles’ story. And so I said no to things that otherrnpeople would’ve said yes to, for personal gain. And I believe that’s truly why it has gone so far and wide. Andrnliterally across the globe and day that the publicist had sent Dan through, Frank called and he said, Tiffany, Irna hundred percent support that you are telling these people, all these people, no, I’m okay with it. He goes,rnbut if there is one thing that you could please say yes to, there’s this guy and he’s a fighter pilot. You know,rnFrank was in the Air Force. He goes, he wants us to come to this outing in Owasso at the Patriot, which is,rnyou know, the golf, the club.rnAnd he goes, I, you know, in order for me to go, you guys have to go. So could you consider saying yes tornthis? I said, well, I’ll give the guy a call. How about that? And I knew, I called Dan Rooney on his cell phone.rnAnd I knew the minute that we were on the phone, that he was genuine, authentic. It was real that he wasn’trntake advantage of my son, or our family, or exploit our story, or exploit Andy or Myles.rnAnd, you know I can’t say enough, enough good things about Dan in particular, but also anybody that I’vernencountered who is a part of the mission. They, I have not met one person who does not genuinely standrnbehind our family and the fact that they’re educating these kids. And I’ll tell you, because of Myles’ story andrnthe exposure we’ve had and things that I’ve been privy to, it is exceptionally rare. That’s why I’ll always standrnwith Folds.rnrnGreg:rnTo sit here and listen. And just so thankful for your commitment, your sacrifice, the lessons you’ve taught allrnthe listeners today. You know, when Dan says, who I do not know, Dan Rooney, but just watching him andrnlearning about him, truly is a hero.rnAnd please everybody, in listening to these stories, let’s remember 1% of our country fights for the freedomrnof the other 99%. And let’s make sure we understand that freedom isn’t free. And if we’re ever in a situationrnlike that airplane, let’s stay seated and let’s give our heroes the respect they’ve earned and deserved. Godrnbless both of you and God bless our military.rnThank you for listening to the Imagine That podcast. We hope you enjoyed this episode and welcome you tornreach out to Confluence Financial Partners with your questions and comments. If you’d like to hear morernepisodes, head over to confluencefp.com/podcasts, or find us wherever you get your podcast.