Tips for Raising Confident Children | Season 2, Episode 5

• Greg Weimer

00:04

Hello and welcome to the Imagine that podcast. I’m your host, Greg Weimer, founder, partner and wealth manager at Confluence Financial Partners. Each month, we’ll explore new ways to help you maximize your life and your legacy and meet some extraordinary people along the way. So if you’re looking to get more out of your life today and legacy tomorrow, let’s get started. Welcome. I’m Greg, and welcome to the imagine that podcast. I’m really looking forward to today for a lot of reasons.

• GW

Greg Weimer

00:34

Sometimes the things we imagine are really positive. And I think today we can imagine and hope and pray that we’ll be actually literally able to save someone’s life or at least add some peace to some families out there. And I’ll tell you why I say it that way, is today we’re going to talk to families about something that is a real pandemic in our nation, and that is the mental health of our children today. Not to scare you with a statistic, but one of the leading causes of death in the United States of America with adolescents is suicide. And I’ll be more specific in that 18% of deaths with adolescents. Are suicide. We all fear cancer, rightfully so, but it’s only four and a half percent of the deaths in America.

• GW

Greg Weimer

01:34

I’m gonna say that again. 18% of the deaths in America with adolescents suicide. Four and a half percent of the deaths in America, adolescents, cancer. We need to do better as a nation. And there’s good news. There’s good news is. I think the good news is, I think it has our attention.

• GW

Greg Weimer

01:51

America has woke up to the fact that this is a problem, and we’re talking about it, and we’re going to talk about it today with one of my favorite guests ever. And I mean that because her name is Madison Weimer, and I’m extremely proud that Madison, in her life, her purpose and her passion is to help bend the curve on the numbers I just gave you. Madison is a licensed professional counselor, and that came with an awful lot of schooling, an awful lot of dedication, and she helps families. And she used to just work with children. Now she works with more than just children. Her specialty is in OCD. And in hearing you talk about your profession, it is amazing how many people go from struggling with a mental health issue to going to suicide.

• GW

Greg Weimer

02:41

So let’s do this in a couple components. Let’s start with, by the way, I want you to share the statistic you share with us over there about how many? Yeah. So let’s do that. And then let’s talk about, like, after you share that statistic, why don’t you give us some things that families and children can do to prevent a mental health issue? Then how do we recognize one? Then what do we do when one occurs?

• GW

Greg Weimer

03:13

Because I feel like people just feel lost. So I don’t know. I just feel like our goal we were talking about before we started recording, like, our goal is just to help a couple kids. Our goal is just to help a couple families. So hopefully we’re able to do that in the next period of time. Give the stat.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

03:28

Give the stat. Okay, so the stat that we were talking about before this is that 20% of adolescents contemplate suicide at some point in their lives.

• GW

Greg Weimer

03:37

That scares the **** out of me.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

03:38

It’s a lot, a lot of. Of teenagers, and it has become incredibly normal. It’s a topic that in. But wait, but wait. Yeah, so.

• GW

Greg Weimer

03:48

When we say normal, does that mean it’s like, almost becomes acceptable? Do you know what I mean? We were talking about different cultures, so we were also talking about different cultures. And some cultures, it’s very low. And in other cultures, my concern is because it’s considered normal. Normal. That means that.

• GW

Greg Weimer

04:08

I worry that that means that it becomes acceptable. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

04:11

Yeah. So. And there is cultures that it’s not as discussed, and those are cultures also that mental health is not as discussed. So they do suffer in silence, sometimes a little bit more. But they also have different protective factors that causes them to not go to suicide as frequently maybe, as our culture does. But, yeah, it’s become a normalized topic. But it’s also.

• GW

Greg Weimer

04:33

So wait, if it’s 20%, though, like, you know, I mean, I had four kids, right? So you think about that, right? I mean, you do. You think, like, holy cow. I mean, I was in a Southwest catholic academy. Awesome place. I was there this morning for mass.

• GW

Greg Weimer

04:46

You know, there’s 400 kids in there. I could do the math pretty quick. Right? I mean, that’s like, 80 kids. Yeah. And so that’s big. And that’s contemplating suicide.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

04:54

It doesn’t mean that they necessarily want to act on it in that moment or are going to act on it, but it’s thought that crosses their mind of, it would be easier if I weren’t here. Something would be get. It would get better if I could just go to sleep and. Horrible.

• GW

Greg Weimer

05:09

Like, just as a parent, kids. Not true. Yeah. Like, just untrue. Like, so, like, that could be the story you’re telling yourself. Start telling yourself a different story. Yeah.

• GW

Greg Weimer

05:18

Untrue. Yeah. Okay. Mad and I think that’s what we want to work on. If it’s 20%, should parents be talking to their kids about it or. Yeah. Put it.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

05:27

No, absolutely. So I think a lot of people think that talking about suicide is going to make it happen more, and it’s actually the complete opposite. Just asking someone if they’re having those thoughts is not going to make it. Let’s do that again.

• GW

Greg Weimer

05:40

It’s important. Right. Because I’ve heard that before. Yeah. It’s a scary thing to bring up.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

05:46

Right.

• GW

Greg Weimer

05:47

But I think a parent, if I talk about suicide, oh, my gosh, they’re going to commit suicide. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

05:50

No, you didn’t put the thought in their head they had or they don’t. You’re giving them the ability to open up and speak about thoughts that are really scary and sometimes feel isolating and like there’s something wrong with you and that it’s never going to get better and you’re just going to suffer in that silence in your own head. All right, we’ll go back to the preventative thing.

• GW

Greg Weimer

06:05

But I love the one time that you said, and you may not remember, we were talking and you said, if a teenager ever says to you, like, what’s going on in their life, what’s the best thing you can say to make them feel good? We’re going to talk about that, too.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

06:16

All right. We’re going to talk about that. We’ll get to that later then.

• GW

Greg Weimer

06:19

I love that. So anyhow, go to. So what can we do? Yeah. Well, I was going to say if I’m a parent, I am. You are parents.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

06:26

To all the parents out there.

• GW

Greg Weimer

06:27

What are some of the things. And kids, like, what are some of the children, what are some of the things we should be doing? Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

06:32

So when we look at. How we can prevent it. So there’s a way to prevent.

• GW

Greg Weimer

06:39

By the way, this fires me up, the fact that we’re able to do this. I’m glad it was, first of all, not only like a father daughter thing, but it’s really cool that, like, we’re able to help kids. The fact that, like, we’re talking about this and actually, I think it’s awesome. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

06:51

So let’s do ABCs of keeping yourself in a good mood. So it’s ABC plus two, because there’s two things that I think parents can be doing that are really important. Come up very frequently in sessions with teens. So the a stands for accumulating positive experiences. The more we accumulate positive experiences. It’s like a buffer. It’s like bubble wrap to negative experiences.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

07:09

Right. So we should actively be doing at least two things every day, intentionally, just to put ourselves in a good mood. That can be as simple as fish fry with your dad tonight.

• GW

Greg Weimer

07:20

That’s exactly it.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

07:20

Yes. I was gonna say something like the drink you have in the morning, stuff like that. And what you’ll recognize is as you intentionally do things to put yourself in a good mood. Small things, nothing crazy. And be aware of them. And be aware of them, the more you’re going to start to be aware of the other things that make you in a good mood. So the little things throughout your day that you’re thankful for and grateful for, that puts you in a good mood.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

07:43

So that gives us purpose, and it gives us hope, right? So we want a life worth living and something worth living for. Purpose. So a lot of kids lose purpose, and they’re like, what’s the point of this life? I don’t know. So just by accumulating positive experiences, we’re able to, one, kind of have, like, a buffer against negative experiences, and two, give ourselves a purpose in life and have a life worth living for. So as a dad, so.

• GW

Greg Weimer

08:07

And I’m not having any more kids, but. So with our grandchildren, like, you just really want them to. You want to make them aware in the moment of enjoying it instead of just like, passively going through it? Is that it? You make them present to the moment? Or maybe if it’s an adult, instead of just drinking cup. The cup of coffee?

• GW

Greg Weimer

08:29

Yeah. You’re excited about the cup of coffee?

• MW

Maddy Weimer

08:31

I love the coffee. Yeah. I can’t wait.

• GW

Greg Weimer

08:33

At 05:00 when I say excited about it, I love it. So that’s it, like, gives you a purpose.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

08:37

I’m waking up this morning because I have a cup of coffee that I’m pumped for. I can’t wait for it. It’s amazing that that’s so small. So small.

• GW

Greg Weimer

08:44

So, so small.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

08:45

But it’s so small. So with your children, make sure they’re enjoying the moment. Doing things every day that is just for them because you also think they’re at school. They’re at school all day, and that’s stuff that’s given to them, assigned for them that they don’t necessarily have a choice over. So having things that they’re intentionally doing that they’re excited about, that they enjoy, and it doesn’t have to be anything.

• GW

Greg Weimer

09:04

So that half hour of pushing your kid on the swing or going for the walk or reading the book and all the things that sometimes we don’t have time for. Right. It’s important. Yep. So it’s not that you’re entertaining them for a half hour. It is that you’re helping their mental health.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

09:24

You’re helping them be able to have a buffer against negative experiences. So you’re helping them buffer against that person at school that said something negative to them, that grade at school that made them upset. They’re way more easier to handle that if it’s going to be something that then by nighttime, they’re happy, they’re playing on the spring. And that’s. I love that experience. What was the a? That’s.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

09:42

Accumulate.

• GW

Greg Weimer

09:43

Accumulate. I got it.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

09:44

Okay.

• GW

Greg Weimer

09:45

So then b is build mastery.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

09:47

So doing things that’s going to help you learn a skill, build a skill, doing something that is going to make you feel intentional, efficient and competent. Right. So that is going to, like, the piano lessons isn’t really about the piano.

• GW

Greg Weimer

10:01

No, it’s.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

10:01

And what we learn, actually, is we actually see more happiness. Chemicals go off in the brain when we’re learning something, rather than we, when we achieve what we thought we were going to like. Get to that point. You learned a lot. I know.

• GW

Greg Weimer

10:14

I know more than you think.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

10:15

Yeah, I know more than you think. That’s wonderful. So those.

• GW

Greg Weimer

10:20

So that. Whether it’s a sport, whether it’s an instrument, whatever. Crafting. Yeah, whatever it is. And I think we sometimes put too much emphasis on sports. Right. Yeah.

• GW

Greg Weimer

10:30

It’s those other things. It can be learning how to make your true for adults, too. I mean, I think adults are happiest when they’re learning to improve something. Yeah. All right, so I got that. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

10:39

So it battles against hopelessness and helplessness, which is one of the number one things in depression that leads to suicide. Hopelessness and helplessness. Okay, so then we have the c, which is coping ahead. Coping ahead is going to be thinking about, okay, what do we do when those negative situations happen? How can I cope positively. So doing things such as breathing exercises, journaling, going for a walk, talking. This comes from a person that when I tell her to breathe, she gets mad at me, but go ahead.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

11:06

Okay, so I was just gonna say teenagers, and I’m out of my teenage years, but most adults as well, when you tell them to do something in the moment, that’s okay. It might get a little bit. It might go upset about it. Be careful with that. So this is why we cope. Ahead is important. Right?

• MW

Maddy Weimer

11:19

So when we’re calm, we sit there talking about, like, what do we do? Like, what do we do when we’re upset? What are we gonna do? What’s our plan? Right, okay, so our plan is that I’m gonna, like, nudge you and be like, it’s time for that walk. Like, this is the coping skills we talked about. So incorporating coping skills is really important.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

11:36

So in our business, the market goes down every once in a while, and we call them lifeboat drills.

• GW

Greg Weimer

11:39

Yeah. Like. Like, you don’t. You don’t learn. You don’t learn about a lifeboat when the boat’s going down, the cruisers going down. You go. Cruise ships go down.

• GW

Greg Weimer

11:47

You learn about a lifeboat when you’re. Yep. Peace of mind.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

11:50

Yeah. So coping.

• GW

Greg Weimer

11:52

Got it. Coping ahead. Yep. So that’s the abcs.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

11:54

And then we have plus two important things for parents to implement. So one is communication. And this is where we get back to the thing that I told you teenagers want to hear when they’re. I love that. I said, you need to learn to just say, that’s so annoying. I got it. That’s so annoying.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

12:08

So annoying.

• GW

Greg Weimer

12:09

Right.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

12:09

And it’s not in a way of being fake, it’s truly getting into their brain and feeling empathy for their situation, not fixing it, not solving it, not giving them. That’s important way because that’s what we try to do. Right.

• GW

Greg Weimer

12:21

As a parent, you always try to fix it like we’re gonna make go away. Instead, it’s like, I get you. They just want someone to listen. It’s annoying.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

12:28

I got it.

• GW

Greg Weimer

12:29

They want someone to listen. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

12:31

That person in class that was going on, that’s so annoying. Instead of saying, you should do this, they just want to hear someone listen. So communication open and honestly communicating about feelings is really important. So adults can model positive communication as well. So being able to express themselves when they are having a negative emotion in a calm. Way and asking for what they need. That is going to help children also be able to do that in the future and then offer empathy and just listen.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

13:01

Just listen. I mean, most people, when you think about it, what do they want? They just want someone to listen to them. No question. They just want someone to get it and listen. And that’s why therapy is so helpful, because it’s someone that is just there to solely listen. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

13:15

And that’s it. We’re there to listen and hear you and really get it. So communication is one of the plus twos. And the second one is letting your kids fail with support. They need to know how to handle negative situations. Yeah. As a nation, we’re raising fragile kids.

• GW

Greg Weimer

13:36

Yeah. Because we’re running around with pillows so they don’t get bruised. Yeah. So saving them is not going to help them.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

13:43

Right. Being there for them, offering them empathy through it, telling them, I am here for you no matter what, I love you no matter what. So important. Right. But taking the problem away for them. Not hopeful. They learn to then think that any negative emotion is amplified.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

14:01

I can’t. From a parent’s perspective, that’s the hardest of all.

• GW

Greg Weimer

14:05

Yep. Because you feel your. If you’re able. New times five. Yep. Like, if you’re filling it one. Like I’m filling it at five.

• GW

Greg Weimer

14:13

So. So, you know, and, like, I just want to make it go away. Like, make it go away. Yep. And so. So wait, summarize. Just go ahead, do it again.

• GW

Greg Weimer

14:22

Okay. So abcs, plus two. So we have accumulate positive experiences.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

14:26

We have build mastery. We have cope ahead. And then we have our plus two. So that’s communication. Big on empathy and listening. And then we have letting them fail with support. So as a nation.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

14:38

As a nation, if we could do that.

• GW

Greg Weimer

14:40

I don’t know if the 18% goes to two. I don’t know if it goes to 16, it can’t go up. If we’re doing the right things. And if nothing else, maybe we just have some stronger, more resilient, more resilient, less behavioral health issues in America. Now, having said that, and I have to say this, then we’re going to move on to that. But if, when you have a behavioral health issue, what are some things to look for? I also.

• GW

Greg Weimer

15:04

One of the things frustrates me about behavioral health. It’s like a pet peeve. We think it’s something that these children do to themselves. We think it’s like, we don’t say, like, you know, they’ll say, oh, they have everything in the world, why are they having behavioral health issues? You don’t say, like, they have everything in the world. Why do they have diabetes? Like, it makes me crazy.

• GW

Greg Weimer

15:22

The fact that, like, it’s almost like we act like it’s a deficiency, not a health issue. So it’s a health issue and we need to think about it like a health issue and stop acting like it’s some deficiency in this human being. They’re awesome, they’re wonderful, they’re unique. This happens to be the thing they struggle with. Yep. Yeah. Just as someone with a physical illness would struggle, it’s the same thing for mental health.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

15:44

I think another important statistic is that 10% of our happiness, only 10% of our happiness. Happiness comes from our life circumstances. So, like the money we have, the house we live in, the new clothes, the new car, 10% of our happiness. That’s only. There’s other things. Yeah, that’s interesting.

• GW

Greg Weimer

16:01

Okay, so now, because somewhere along the way, if there’s this many people thinking about children thinking about people, children thinking about suicide and actually committing suicide, And having. And you said earlier, which is heartbreaking. Suffering and silence. Right. They’re suffering and no one knows. And how lonely that would feel.

• GW

Greg Weimer

16:28

What are some of the people the loved ones around these children can do? Or what are some of the things that the people around these children can watch for? Can watch for. So you want to look for any changes. Right?

• MW

Maddy Weimer

16:41

So changes in appetite, so eating more or less than usual. You wanna look for changes in sleep. Then you also wanna look for feelings of isolation. So, like, pulling away from their friends. Naturally, in teenage years, that’s it. They’re gonna wanna sit in their ups and downs. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

16:58

But at the same time, they’re probably still gonna wanna hang out with their friends.

• GW

Greg Weimer

17:02

So.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

17:03

I see. I happen to think sitting in the room thing is a bad thing. It’s not a great thing. Right.

• GW

Greg Weimer

17:07

We need a little space sometimes. I get it, but it’s not a great thing.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

17:10

So. Yeah. Careful how much you’re sitting here. Careful how much you’re isolating. It doesn’t make you feel better. Right? So isolating is a big one to look for excessive worrying about things like, it is not normal to be having a panic attack once a week.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

17:24

It’s not normal. I think it’s become normalized. It’s not. You shouldn’t be crying at school weekly. That’s not normal. Right. That’s when we seek more help.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

17:33

Something else is going on inside their head. Let’s see what other things. But if people were just aware of that because, you know, you. And there’s.

• GW

Greg Weimer

17:42

Oh, they’re in the room. Right. Or the crying at school or whatever the emotion. I mean, and I guess there’s moments of time you go through stuff like that. We all have times. Yeah, we all have those things. But just to be aware and almost just more in touch with what’s going on, it’s not normal.

• GW

Greg Weimer

17:56

It’s not normal. Yeah. Yeah. Mood changes is a big one as well.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

17:59

Yeah. Teenagers are moody, for sure, but there becomes a. What about physical stuff? Like, they start doing, I was gonna say. And then there’s the physical things. Right. So, like, you also have to look at the amount of teenagers that come to me and say they have stomach issues.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

18:14

Constant. Right. So, like, if there’s not, if you’re going to doctors and they’re not finding anything wrong, there’s probably mental health stuff going on that’s going on inside their head. Right. So we have, like, stomach issues, headaches, all of that stuff that’s going to be signs and that’s just from the stress in their world. Okay. Got it.

• GW

Greg Weimer

18:33

So now when something like that happens, hopefully, hopefully we’ve prevented it. But if we haven’t prevented it, we can identify it. Now that we identify it, I talk to parents all the time, and it doesn’t, it’s almost unanimous that when it happens, there is a feeling of where do I go? What do I do? I feel totally helpless. So what are some of the things a parent can do to help? Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

19:01

So I think one of the hardest worlds to navigate is the mental health world and finding a therapist, finding support, and when you’re in that moment, it’s urgent. Right. I need help. Yeah, you can’t. And, you know, access is hard, right?

• GW

Greg Weimer

19:12

So you call, you know, whatever you call a therapist, and it’s like, I can see you. I can see you, May. Yeah.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

19:20

We’re all working really hard to get in as many clients as we possibly can, but we’re. So many of us are at our limit, and we’re at our max, and we can’t see any more.

• GW

Greg Weimer

19:29

We can cut this out if you don’t want me to say it, but if you call for Maddie, where she works, they’re going to tell you she’s booked because you’re booked. But we’re going to put Madison’s. I call her Madison. The world calls her Maddie. So when you call her, she’s Maddie. But we’re going to put Madison’s contact information on our website attached to this, attached to this podcast. And by the way, for people who don’t know, our website is confluencefp.com

• GW

Greg Weimer

19:59

You go to our podcast. Imagine that. You’ll see the one that we’re doing today with Madison. You can look, and I’m gonna give you some other resources. Also, you can get Maddie’s contact information, and you know, she will best. She can not be booked. You don’t have to.

• GW

Greg Weimer

20:16

You don’t have to cut that out. But, yes, you can see my contact information if you contact me.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

20:21

I do my best to move my schedule around to get people in when they’re in need. So. You can always reach out and contact me. But, yeah, so if your child comes to you or your start, and by the way, this is not a plug to you at Madison business, she’s booked. I am booked. Yeah, I am booked. But I will do my best.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

20:35

But if your child comes to you, they’re struggling, or you’re noticing signs that they’re struggling, that’s when you sit down and you have a conversation and you say, I think we need more help, and then say, I am here for you and I want to find you someone. You say, I think we need. At that point, you think that you need to go find somebody.

• GW

Greg Weimer

20:54

It’s not like, hey, let smile in the mirror, or like, you know, no, that is at the point when we say, hey, I noticed some struggles going on, and let’s get you some extra support.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

21:03

Just as you said earlier of like, hey, I noticed your physical health is wavering a little bit. You seem to have a cold. Let’s go to the doctor. Same thing for mental health. I’m noticing some struggles going on. I’m going to find you extra support. Right.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

21:15

So then looking. You can look online as well of like, people that are going to fit for what you’re looking for, anxiety, all that kind of stuff. But then there’s also crisis of, like, we are in immediate need right now. My child is saying some things that are very concerning and I need support right now because they’re in immediate danger. And at that point, then we do have crisis numbers and support to help with that, like resolve. Resolve is great one.

• GW

Greg Weimer

21:41

Okay, so for, and we’ll put all this on our website, resolve. So this is if you have a crisis going on and, like, you’re afraid something bad is going to happen, it’s amazing how many people do not know resolve exists and resolve is 1888. You can. Yeah. Is that right? Yeah. 1888, you can.

• GW

Greg Weimer

22:03

I’ll give you the 1888-796-8226 yeah. Okay. So that’s resolved. So that’s resolved. And honestly, what resolve will do as well is if you’re really struggling and they need to come to you, they will.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

22:16

So they will. They will actually take a mobile team and send them to you if you need them to as well. So this is just a passion. And I’ve learned, I’m learning more and more about this. One of the wonderful things.

• GW

Greg Weimer

22:27

And hopefully the rest of people are listening to this. Outside of Pittsburgh have similar. But Pittsburgh has remarkable resources. They just appear to me to be somewhat disorganized and I don’t. They’re hard to find. They’re hard to find where to look for them. But Pittsburgh is blessed with incredible resources.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

22:44

Okay. So resolve.

• GW

Greg Weimer

22:45

Resolve is a great one. Every county has a different crisis number as well.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

22:50

So you can find your county’s crisis number and contact them as well. Okay. I do know that children’s, because I’m involved in children’s. It’s doing remarkable work.

• GW

Greg Weimer

22:59

In fact, we would encourage you, if you’re listening and you’re fired up about this, that we’re going to make a difference. Children’s is going to be a leader in helping in this issue. And, you know, so children’s has just started recently on the third floor, up to 18 years old. It’s a walk in clinic. So we have a behavioral health walk in clinic, so didn’t have that before. We have psychologists and psychiatrists embedded in the children’s pediatrician network through western Pennsylvania. So there are more and more resources.

• GW

Greg Weimer

23:37

We’ll put all of this, there’s whole child, which is a new concept. So we’re going to put all of this attached to this podcast. And I do actually have friends that work for children’s pediatrics as well as therapists.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

23:52

And they do a great job at initially, like resolving the crisis, and then they will find you someone that they think is really well suited to you as a therapist. So they can do a great job in getting you in with someone that’s going to be able to see your child long term. And I just know in talking to you and talking to others, a therapist is a personal thing.

• GW

Greg Weimer

24:09

It’s like dating is what we say. So it’s like dating that you kind of have to shop around and see who’s going to be best suited to you.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

24:16

Yeah. Yeah. Because I think some people go find a therapist, there’s not the connection.

• GW

Greg Weimer

24:22

And they say, I’m never going to get married. And it’s like, no, it’s like you have to find the right therapist that you’re comfortable having a conversation with. So I just worry that some people, I went to a therapist, it didn’t work. Yeah, you might have to try a few. You might have to try a few.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

24:39

It can be defeating and discouraging, but if you find the right one, it can be so special. So as a parent, don’t try to fix the problem on your own.

• GW

Greg Weimer

24:47

Don’t feel uncomfortable about going and getting help. Listen and communicate. And the good news is I find. I don’t know, maybe just because people know I care so much about this, I find more and more people. I think everybody should have a therapist. I agree. I think everybody should have a therapist.

• GW

Greg Weimer

25:03

And you have a coach for everything. You should have a therapist. But the good news is, I think the stigma of getting a therapist is definitely decreasing. I will say with the younger ones, teens, it’s trendy now. It’s cool.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

25:20

It’s trendy to have a therapist. So, like, it’s not gonna be this big, scary, like, thing that they have going on of, like, oh, my gosh, they’re seeing a therapist. No, it’s trendy. They all talk about their therapist. Their friends know my name, which is how it is. I guess I worry. Like, I know.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

25:37

Like, I just worry that it’s, like, I don’t want it to be trendy.

• GW

Greg Weimer

25:41

Do you know what I mean by that? Yes. But in the same way, they have someone to speak to, in some ways, I get it. I think it’s awesome. But it’s like, what’s not trendy is being mentally sick and having problems.

• MW

Maddy Weimer

25:51

What is trendy, though, is being open and honest about your feelings and having someone to support you through it. That’s cool. That’s awesome. And I think parents give your kids that gift. I mean, you may have a child.

• GW

Greg Weimer

26:04

Worst case scenario, contemplating suicide, potentially suffering in silence. And because in some cases, you believe there’s a stigma about going to get a therapist, you’re providing them the peace and happiness for the rest of their life. And so, like, get over it and get over it, and you may provide your child peace, or you may save their life. Mad, I got to tell you, I am proud of you. Thanks. I think what you do is amazing. I think it’s very necessary.

• GW

Greg Weimer

26:38

Hopefully today, with some of the nuggets you shared, we’re able to help somebody out there, and if it’s just one person, we’ve achieved our goal. So thank you so much. I really appreciate it, and you are a wealth of information. Thanks. Thank you.